Siri 76a: LOCKDOWN @DENMARK (PART 1)
How did I fare in the early days (March-May) of Covid-19? Three weeks into lockdown I realized I was in the midst of Grieving Process; recognizing how my behaviour and my dreams revealed my unconscious state of mind and heart. Week by week I moved from denial into depression into anger, later acceptance, then again depression and bargaining. Grieving has no real end, just different phases and faces, an inherited sense of disempowerment became discernible and manifest in a broken tooth.
My grandmother died from the Spanish Flu in December 1918. She was 36 years old. Her seven children were also sick but survived her. In January 2020 I took that as a warning when we learned about the Wuhan outbreak. However, I thought this is just another flu. Our health system has improved enormously in those 102 years. However, the health authorities expressed serious concern: this is not an ordinary flu.
I shopped hand-disinfectant two weeks before lockdown March 12. Later I was shopping cautiously in almost deserted supermarkets.
I cancelled two scheduled dinners for relatives and friends; had visits at a distance with my 81-year-old aunt and with close relatives.
Uncertain and apprehensive, frantically following the news by the hour, seeking to control my addiction to mail and online passivity until six weeks into lockdown when I found my uncle of 90 years dead and decomposing (presumably suffering heart failure hours after last telephone contact (no Covid-19 infection). Could it happen to me? Like him, I also live alone with no one to check up on me daily. Like him, I don’t call for help. Unlike him, I have no known health issues. Could I have helped him better?
Media news I subsequently treated with indifference. Moreover, I withdrew from some social settings. Disempowerment... apprehensive……
August 27, 2020
Claus Monrad Spliid
KanWork Supporter
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